I want to break some toys.

I have wanted to break something all weekend. I keep having awful visions of me snapping Nerf guns in half. Stephanie and I are worn out. These kids don’t understand the value of anything, cars, toys, legos, cell phones even if they are broken , Popsicles, even down to wasting rather expensive gluten free bread. They just don’t get it. All of the things in our house have value and cost money, even the wall just just kicked through or the door you destroyed with your nails.

During a fit this weekend I said ya know, every time you intentionally destroy something of ours I’ll do the same to you, all the while hoping I would get the change to snap a toy in half with my awesome sarah hulk power. About 3 this morning I realized how horrible I sounded….

I’m so so thankful that God does not have the same bad attitude parenting that I did this weekend. He loves me no matter what. Sure I can sabotage God given relationships, break jobs and opportunities, abuse my body, and not “play” with the gifts hes given me. Thankfully He is still there though. If I throw a fit and say “GOD I’M NEVER SINGING AGAIN” he doesn’t take that away from me. I can scream about how much I hate something, or whine about how much I don’t want to do that chore…. yet he is still right there listening and loving me with all the patience in the world.

The Lord is slow to anger and abundant in loving kindness, forgiving iniquity and transgression…

Numbers 14:18
Stephanie and I aren’t the ones who can calm these boys down, we can’t “fix it”, or take their pain away…. All we can do is love them like Jesus loves us and pray we make a difference.

All that being said… we need prayer.
This weekend was rough.

Leave a Reply