ok so in orientation yesterday one of the teachers was making a joke about the 1st year no dating rule and said
Everyone in the building cracked up but much to my surprise not me….. my eyes suddenly filled with tears and God decided to take me for a loop. Bam right there in the middle of a joke I had a small breakthrough ect…..
Just the night before I was going through some of the things I brought back and ran across “Every Woman’s Battle- discovering God’s plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment” I put it on the shelf and thought to my self – eh I don’t need to read that again I’m not struggling in those areas….
right there in the middle of class and surround by all the 2 semesters -3rd years I had a break down.
suddenly the words “emotionally pure” popped into my head and taunted me for the rest of the day 🙂
so thank Heavens for Ibooks because I hopped on my handy dandy ipod and searched emotionally pure and bam there was a book recommended by some of my favorite authors…
soooooo I bought it…
After the first chapter I realized I’m in a “emotional relationship” with multiple men. This broke my heart just a little because how can I say I’m ready to be married to one man for the rest of my life when obviously there’s other junk going on in my emotions and subconscious.
If you know me or read this blog it will come as no surprise to you that I’m ready to be married. I know God won’t keep me single a day longer than planned though 😀 and that my friends is a new found comfort for me!
Why am I sharing all this with the blog world?
some of the people highly disagree with me airing my dirty laundry all over the internet
I feel that God is starting to break through and work something huge in my life with this right now and I would like to take y’all on the journey. Also I may need the accountability, and could sure use the prayer.
Up until now I honestly thought it had been guarded, slowly I’m realizing maybe I’m not as tough as I think.